So you find yourself in San Francisco, the kink capital of the world! But you have no idea where to go because the kink scene likes to keep things under wraps… or under cuffs or ropes. Do you risk going into seedy spots only to be met with lame plastic toys and mysterious stains? As the SF Dominatrix, I’m often asked what kinky spaces I would recommend. In this post, I’m going to divulge my top 4 absolute favorite frisky places in ‘Frisco. But my first piece of advice is to tell you that there’s no faster way to “out” yourself as a tourist than by calling San Francisco, ‘Frisco. I just couldn’t resist the alliteration.
Mr. S Leather
Let’s start with the biggest. Mr. S Leather is not only the most well known and largest place on this list, it’s one of the best BDSM & Leather retail stores in the world! My favorite section of Mr. S is its Electro Play station, but a feature that not a lot of people know about is their chastity section. Instead of spending hundreds of dollars on chaffing chastity wear, you can find your perfect size by trying on dilligently disinfected pieces before you buy. Mr. S also has a key holding service, should you be without a dominatrix to keep you accountable.
Perfect For: The Leather Fetishist.
If you have a love for leather, there is no better place than Mr. S. As soon as you enter the store, a strong, signature scent of leather mixed with sportiness hits you. Speaking of hitting, there’s not just leather impact toys here either. There’s entire wardrobes of leather wear and leather sex furniture that could fill an entire home.
Pro Tip: If you can, avoid going during the week of Folsom Street Fair and the weekend of Dore Alley. Mr. S Leather hosts parties during that time and the store will be packed with packs of cutie cubs and burly bears. For a first timer, it can be a little overwhelming. Even if you’re a Folsom regular, you don’t have to deal with long lines.
Wicked Grounds
Wicked Grounds is truly a hub for San Francisco’s kink community. They’re not just a kink café (which is already incredible in its own right). They host workshops, munches, and they sell high quality toys from local makers. Wicked Grounds also has the largest and best curated selection of kink books in the city. When accruing books for my kink library, I learned the expensive way that not all kink books are created equal. But I shop with confidence when at Wicked Grounds, because I know they are personally vetted by Wicked Grounds’ owner Mir.
Perfect For: The Apprehensive Pervert.
Have you been scoping a dominatrix’s website or her Fetlife/Twitter/Instagram profile for a while, but you’re too nervous to schedule a play date? Wicked Grounds is the perfect place to arrange a relaxed, lowkey coffee meetup beforehand. What’s amazing is that you can truly speak freely about your kinky interests and no one will bat an eye to your conversation should they overhear you. Wicked Grounds is also in the heart of San Francisco’s Historic Leather District, should you want to do some kinky shopping for your play date afterwards.
Pro Tip: Order the banana bread. It’s my favorite thing on the menu and it will soon be your favorite too. ---Update: Wicked Grounds has since closed its café but remains an excellent space to take classes and to attend kinky community events.
Dark Garden
You might have heard of Agent Provacateur, but the quality of corsets and lingerie you’ll find at Dark Garden far exceed anything you’ll see in AP or other lingerie providers with greater name recognition. Dark Garden is deeply rooted in San Francisco’s kink history. And when it comes to corsetry, Dark Garden is world renowned. But there are so many divine things here beyond corsets: leather berets and fascinators, elegant harness-like accessories, and dresses that hug every curve that a corset amplifies.
Perfect For: S&M Shopping Dates
One of my favorite places to go to on shopping dates is Dark Garden. And for those who love to see their Domina in delicate stockings and lingerie—and especially those who love to see a big smile on their Domina’s face—Dark Garden is the place to go.
Good Vibes -Polk Street
Good Vibrations was founded in 1977 by Joani Blank as the first female-friendly, approachable sex shop. There are 4 Good Vibrations locations in San Francisco, but the Polk location is my favorite. It’s not the original location nor the largest, what makes this location my top pick is tucked away like a treasure in the back of the store…
The Vibrator Museum!
For reading until the end, I’m going to reward you with an extra special secret East Bay spot!
BONUS SECRET SPOT: Voxbody!
I was very close to not even talking about Voxbody, that’s how special this space is to me and the rope community. The location of Voxbody’s original location used to be secret. But their new location is more accessible than ever: Just a 5 minute walk from the MacArthur Bart station, Voxbody prides itself on creating a safe rope space for all bodies, gender identities, and sexual orientations-they’re space is even ADA accessible.
When a close friend from out of town asks me for kink recommendations, Voxbody is always on my list.